why me?

why are things always like this for me? i finally get over one guy in my life that i liked for 7 1/2 years..then i get close to someone else. we talk every day of the week, or basically every day. then something happens, like a car accident with a mutual friend. my best friend. for him to realize that he DOES have feelings for her. and will act on them too.

i thought that we might have had something. guess i was wrong.

Your Guardian Angel.

When I see your smile


Tears run down my face


I can't replace


And now that I'm strong I have figured out


How this world turns cold and it breaks through my soul


And I know I'll find deep inside me I can be the one


I will never let you fall(let you fall)I'll stand up with you forever


I'll be there for you through it all(though it all)


Even if saving you sends me to heaven


It's okay. It's okay. It's okay.


Seasons are changing


And waves are crashing


And stars are falling all for us


Days grow longer and nights grow shorter


I can show you I'll be the one


I will never let you fall (let you fall)


I'll stand up with you forever


I'll be there for you through it all (through it all)


Even if saving you sends me to heaven


Cuz you're my, you're my, my, my true love, my whole heart


Please don't throw that away


Cuz I'm here for you


Please don't walk away and


Please tell me you'll stay, stay


Use me as you will


Pull my strings just for a thrill


And I know I'll be okay


Though my skies are turning gray


I will never let you fall


I'll stand up with you forever


I'll be there for you through it all


Even if saving you sends me to heaven.





This song means so much to me. I can't describe how it makes me feel towards a certain person... that person already means so much to me.. It's crazy and confusing. He sends mixed feelings...like we've texted all week. The last night (he was drunk though) he said that girls are trouble. I asked why we were trouble and he said just to look at relationships...then he said what if he dated my best friend. And apparently he likes her..or I don't know! He was very confusing on that subject.

BUTT we were talkin about chocolate cake. (go figure, we talk bout food) Then I said somethin about cookies from barnes and noble and he said, "Or, uh making....out? I'm sorry. I completely lost my train of thought." Woww. Then further in the night, he was sayin "Lovely." I asked him what was lovely and he said you are!

I think he was drunk. Pretty sure he was. This guy is gonna drive me crazyy with flirtin with me, then sayin somethin else..hm.

He is makin me CD's :) and comin to the conference tonight...which means we can share a blanket. ^_^. That reminds me, I need to check on the conference part. Haaha. Gonna see if he texts me today and see if he wants to come down earlier than the conference and play Bioshock, then we can follow Katie up there and not have to listen to country!!! We don't like country. Not at all. I can handle some Taylor Swift, but I have to be in the mood for it. Haaha.